Sometimes, I don't know what is it I did wrong. I mean, I'm not perfect! And I'm not the good-est kid on earth. And I know i'm a bad daughter, student, friend, and even girlfren to everyone. But can't you guys give me a break? I'm a fourteen year old teenager that needs some hugs, a few words of comfort and advice. And an allowance. Is it so damn hard to friggin give a HUG??? Or spend like, 5 minutes just to ask me, "how's ur day?"
And YOU!!!! Who the hell do you freakin think you are??? Don't think you can treat me as a toy and throw me away when I get boring and old! So?? You don't like, tell me! Don't act as though the whole world is yours! Hey! You're not perfect too! Don't act as though you are all that! I love you to bits. And I can only love coz love is the only thing I can give. I don't expect your love back!!! Just don't act as though you don't friggin know me!
I really feel like screaming so loud that all glasses on earth will break. But no sound comes out, I can hear it, only me. Coz I'm screaming in terror and pain inside. my subconcious is screaming and wondering why no one comes and tell me it's okay. That they will be with me, that I don't need to be afraid so long as they are here. Of COURSE no one does that! Who am I to the people around me? The moody rebellious teen that has no feeling. The weird student that doesn't do her homework, fights back and a stubborn kid. The friend that is scared of nothing, that goes first when something goes wrong, that comforts when someone is sad, that never seems to be moody for long. The strong and no nonsense kid. Never cries before in the many years of school life.
That's the freakin impression I give everyone!WHY DO I FREAKIN DO THAT??! I do things, I secretly follow the instructions of people. I LOVE EVERY SINGLE PERSON THAT COMES INTO MY LIFE. Why is it SO hard to get someone to love me back???
I try to look pathetic and miserable in front of everyone. I can't do it. I wanna just let go and cry in front of my frens and let them comfort me. Many times, I feel like crying. I'm just holding them back. Coz I'm egoistic, coz I know they will be dying to know wt happened and it's a complicated story, coz I know if a teacher see, the story will go to my aunt and reach my parents and my WHOLE family. THEN I have to explain to THEM as well. They won't understand. And at last, they will scold me for not telling, and I'll have to force myself not to cry again. WTF????????
There are times where I wonder if people really care? Or they just do coz they need me for something.
And YOU!!!! Who the hell do you freakin think you are??? Don't think you can treat me as a toy and throw me away when I get boring and old! So?? You don't like, tell me! Don't act as though the whole world is yours! Hey! You're not perfect too! Don't act as though you are all that! I love you to bits. And I can only love coz love is the only thing I can give. I don't expect your love back!!! Just don't act as though you don't friggin know me!
I really feel like screaming so loud that all glasses on earth will break. But no sound comes out, I can hear it, only me. Coz I'm screaming in terror and pain inside. my subconcious is screaming and wondering why no one comes and tell me it's okay. That they will be with me, that I don't need to be afraid so long as they are here. Of COURSE no one does that! Who am I to the people around me? The moody rebellious teen that has no feeling. The weird student that doesn't do her homework, fights back and a stubborn kid. The friend that is scared of nothing, that goes first when something goes wrong, that comforts when someone is sad, that never seems to be moody for long. The strong and no nonsense kid. Never cries before in the many years of school life.
That's the freakin impression I give everyone!WHY DO I FREAKIN DO THAT??! I do things, I secretly follow the instructions of people. I LOVE EVERY SINGLE PERSON THAT COMES INTO MY LIFE. Why is it SO hard to get someone to love me back???
I try to look pathetic and miserable in front of everyone. I can't do it. I wanna just let go and cry in front of my frens and let them comfort me. Many times, I feel like crying. I'm just holding them back. Coz I'm egoistic, coz I know they will be dying to know wt happened and it's a complicated story, coz I know if a teacher see, the story will go to my aunt and reach my parents and my WHOLE family. THEN I have to explain to THEM as well. They won't understand. And at last, they will scold me for not telling, and I'll have to force myself not to cry again. WTF????????
There are times where I wonder if people really care? Or they just do coz they need me for something.
Love to some is nothing
Coz they already have everything they want
But love to me is a priceless treasure
It's the only thing I have
To give, and hardly to take.
